This forum needs to be bigger

occupant

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Dec 27, 2020
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I'm here to help with that. My name is Alan, I'm an old fat white guy who has owned a number of B-bodies over the years. Let's make a list, shall we?

1980 Caprice Classic 4-door, two tone blue/blue knit cloth, 267 2bbl Chevy V8/TH350C 3-speed auto, air, radio, not much else, looked like garbage but drove nice with cold air, had to replace the catalytic converter which had been cut off on their lot one night, bought for cheap though, $300 from the Ford dealer in Laramie Wyoming in July 1996. Took it on a trip to Fort Collins and overheated it badly. Scrapped for $80 when I finally got it towed back to town.

1985 Delta 88 Royale Brougham 2-door, gray/maroon cloth, 307 4bbl Olds V8/TH200C 3-speed auto, air, tilt, cruise, power locks and windows, power glass moonroof, wire wheel covers. Bought for $500 from the Ford dealer in Laramie Wyoming in September 1996. Replaced two tires, timing chain and gears, and had a lot of issues with the distributor and carb, but it did get me back to Texas and then all the way up to Ohio. Traded for $1200 towards a 1993 Dodge Dynasty in March 1997 at McDaniel Chevrolet in Marion Ohio.

1980 Electra Limited 4-door, dark green/light green cloth, originally a diesel, at some point converted to a gas 350 Chevy engine from a '79 GMC pickup, TH400 3-speed auto, bought for $300 down $995 from a small car lot in Marion Ohio in December 1996, burned right through the battery cables within a couple weeks and gave it back to the car lot to use that down payment towards a 1985 Charger 2.2 hatchback instead.

1978 Impala 2 seat wagon, light blue over blue vinyl, 305 2bbl Chevy V8/TH350, bought off Excite Classifieds back when that was a thing, $160 in Cleveland Ohio (North Ridgeville area). This guy bought it to paint his house, and then sold it to me when he was done. It was a mess inside but it was latex paint so it cleaned up pretty nice. No A/C! Had a cheap Sparkomatic cassette deck, all the original hubcaps, and drove smooth and floaty like it should. The car would overheat at the slightest provocation so you had to drive gentle. Or if you were in bumper to bumper traffic and you saw an idiot in a Porsche cutting up the shoulder to pass the backup, you could pump the throttle a few times in gear and it would overheat within a few seconds, causing you to "need to pull over" really fast and get in the Porsche idiot's way, sending him through the grass and requiring a tow truck to pull him out, all while you stood nearby waiting for the radiator cap to cool enough to add water and get going again. I scrapped this for $85 when it lost enough compression to not want to start.

1989 Caprice police package, white on blue knit cloth, no engine, no transmission, no radiator, no exhaust, no driveshaft, no nothing. Bought for free. Cost me $75 to tow home and dropped in the RV lot. Forgot about it and the trailer park impounded it after awhile because they didn't know who it belonged to. I hadn't done the title yet or gathered anything to make it run so I let it go.

1984 Caprice Classic 3 seat wagon, beige on brown CL cloth, 305 4bbl Chevy V8, 700R4 4-speed auto. Bought this off eBay for $450 including shipping from Houston to Dallas. Problem is I bought it and paid for it and then went to jail for a few months. When I got out, the seller had already started removing the engine and had hacked up all the wiring. He did assemble it as best he could and delivered it to me, but it was too much for me to do myself and a mechanic shop gave me a $1300 estimate to get it running again so I let it go to scrap for $150.

1979 Delta 88 Royale 2-door, white with white top over light blue cloth, Olds 350 4bbl, TH350, took my first son home from the hospital in this one, but traded it in for a 1997 Lumina a few months later to have working air conditioning. This was known as the Royale With Cheese and I had a lot of fun with this car for the short time I owned it.

1979 Delta 88 Royale 4-door, green on green on more green, Pontiac 301 2bbl, TH350, the only B-body I owned that could do an honest 19-20mpg in mixed driving. Bought for $400, sold for $700.

1988 Buick Electra Estate wagon, white on tan leather with woodgrain, Olds 307 4bbl, 200-4R automatic. This was a massive pile of junk and the interior was torn up and the top of the engine was torn up and it had been cobbled up to run and I got it home and to town and back a few dozen times. It ran but I never could get it to run WELL. Paid $600, sold for the same $600.
 
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occupant

New member
Thread starter
Dec 27, 2020
2
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That said I'm always on the lookout for another, but I'm also a broke old fat white guy with a minimum wage work from home job so I don't exactly have a lot of scratch to work with. Never got a stimulus before, it went to other IRS and state debts. Finally might be getting a refund from 2017, a year I forgot to file, turns out they owe me more than I thought, but they are slow and I might not see it for awhile.

Anyway, I'm in southwest Oklahoma now so there's a lot of dry rust free vehicles here but most don't run, don't have titles, have shredded interiors, and aren't worth the $2000-$3000 they're asking for a basket case.

If the money ever comes in I'll be looking for something in running condition. Would be happier with a 307 powered wagon. Would be happiest with an Olds Custom Cruiser. 1986-1989 would be best, I like the big electronic radios.
 
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